Because he had something better in mind..

When I took this picture near the end of February, I was sat in bed on a Saturday morning, in an uber relaxed state whilst Juan was still asleep. I had begun writing a post about how wonderful the morning was and how grateful I was for the peace of it, espescially as the month ahead was shaping up to be a crazy one. Five Kensington Rehearsals, Three Lamb of God rehearsals and 2/7 stage performances. On top of this attending work full time, giving private music tuition along with teaching my primary class on Sundays. AARRGGHHHH.Busy. Busy. Busy.

All written up in my diary and raring to go... then someone had other plans in mind. I'd been having a lot of really bad headaches, then on the way home from church (the day after taking this photo), I passed out. Juan and I went to the doctors and found that I had low blood sugar. A couple weeks of feeling faint all the time, missing multiple days off work and feeling super fatigued.. another trip back to the doctors told me that officially my glandular fever (in America it's more commonly referred to as mono) had decided to have a spout of return and that there's no real thing I can do for it other than just take life slowly and be kind to myself.

Taking things slowly translated into; no teaching after work, no choir rehearsals and certainly no performances. Even taking the odd morning or afternoon off work. At first this made me really sad and made me feel really inadequate. I had just started to get excited (as clear in one of my earlier posts) about contributing to my music again and then my body shuts down on me and wasn't enabling me to do the things I had planned to do:/

On further thinking, numerous pep talks from my husband and after lots of rest, I'm actually super grateful for the opportunity to have had the extra physical and mental rest. It is Ironic that when I took that picture I had taken it with the intentions of embracing my peaceful surroundings, not knowing when I was next going to find it.. when in actual fact that very scene was going to become my pit of rest for the upcoming weeks.

Life is a little stressful at the moment, and that's another reason I'm grateful. There's some pretty big life changes happening in my life right now (and granted, are probably acting as contributing factors to my cruddy health circumstance.) So the extra time to take things slow is probably preventing me from breaking down even worse in the long run.

On top of these gratefulnesses and silver linings, something exciting happened. Something really potentially exciting. Something that wouldn't have if I hadn't have been unwell. But I'm hesitant to talk about it just in case it doesn't happen as it's still not set in stone, or even sand yet. But. watch.this.space.

It just goes to show that we may make our own plans and set up our ways, but someone else probably has a better plan in mind;) Even if sometimes it really doesn't feel like it much at the time; I am a firm believer that we are all, always, being watched over.

faith.hope and health.
✌️