It is no secret to anyone that I am incredibly homesick.
I have married a wonderful man, my best friend, the love of my life in fact and I live in a beautiful place surrounded by delicious mountains and some incredibly breathtaking scenery and still I miss home.
My immigration process is still in it's beginning stages. My finger prints have been taken and I have received four form receipts. But knowing when my work permit will come through or when my residency status will be adjusted - complete mystery.
This does then, make it very difficult to gage when I might be able to return to England for a visit and just feeds how much I miss home even more.
Everything happened and changed so quickly that I didn't really get much chance to properly appreciate what leaving home for the long-term would really mean to me. At first I was frustrated and wanted the feelings to vanish completely, but then I had a realization that I am so lucky to feel this way and that I should embrace parts of it. I've lived in the same town and country for 23 years - of course I'm going to have made ties, bonds and friendships that would be more than just a little difficult to live away from! What a blessing it is to have so many people that I love and miss so much.
Juan Carlos has been amazing in helping me through the transition. This has been hard for him too. I know that I am meant to be here in Utah, that we are meant to be here in Utah. At least for the foreseeable future. And I know that missing my family and friends is just all part of the process. Why things have happened this way? I don't know the answer to that.
My husband and I are great believers that everything truly does happen for a reason and we try to rely on faith and hope before anything else.
Since my last post - Juan has found work and starts officially as of next Monday and I am currently in the process of applying for a place at a local university in the hopes of attaining a degree in music education. So our little lives are moving forward and I think these new focus' will really help our mentalities.
I realise too now that - No, I can't just got out for a cuppa and a drive with my mum or pop round my sisters for a herbal tea and a biscuit or run round Lucy's place just to listen to reams and reams of acoustic sessions on YouTube and moan our way through a Tesco Thai Green curry!! BUT -- that all these things will be made doubly special for when I can visit and do these things again.
In the meantime there are a few things I have found that really do help remedy the homesickness. Basically anything English.
Here's my top 5:
No.1 English accents.
Movies and English accents- whenever I hear an English accent my ears and heart jump to attention. I never, ever before noticed them (mainly because I have one!) but now I do, I really do -and I am alllllll over them!!! - As well, please note how many movie villains speak with British accents???!! (I'm not sure to be proud or insulted when this happens?!)
No.2 Scenes of London.
So many movies and programmes flash pockets of London. The Thames, Big Ben, the London eye, Piccadilly... it can be anything and I instantly feel homely. One thing I guarantee to anyone who plans to leave their home country and reside elsewhere.. Only then will you truly find out how patriotic you are and it WILL shock you.
No.3 Ed Sheehan
Wasn't that bov'd about the shy, red headed, British lad when I used to live in England.. then almost as soon as I move to the U.S of A. BAM. Ed on repeat. I don't know what happened, but there's something about his voice that became so British to me that on an incredible shift to a lack of Britishness, I could no longer deny myself of it.
So age old isn't it -the mail? I have received the odd letter here and there, a note from my nan, postcard from a friend, that kind of thing? It's so much more personal than a text or an email and gives me a real feel of the person. I love receiving post from home.
No.5 English sitcoms.
I'll look up my favourite British comedy sitcoms on YouTube for a quick fix and it never fails.
No.6 British confectionary.
My mother-in-law brought home some cadbury's chocolate fingers the other day. She said she found them in the British section of a market. Who knew??!
They're not even usually my favourite, but they had never tasted so good!
So to round it off, I'm away from home but it isn't the end of the world. I have some great opportunities out here and a husband who I couldn't live without above all else that is special to me in this world and wow, that's beautiful.
I am in a different country and plan to embrace this fact but you know what? You can take the girl out of England but you sure as heck won't take the England out of the girl...
Peace out ;)
below: a picture of a sneaky offering given to me by my friend amy who came to visit in april. two of my go-to pick up's from the local garage. bbq flavoured hula hoops and a daily mail (so as to do the quick crossword on the back page). incidentally, also two of the first things i will be picking up at the airport once we touchdown in the UK!!
Brit. U.S.resident. Lover of Opera. Believer of dreams.